When I was dealing with a matriarch that was oblivious to her own misandry (because of her upbringing? 🧐) and her own mistakes, she found out that her fragile, demonic mask fell apart in front of me.
Went from Mascara to TRASHcara real quick… lol. It was the first time she went quiet, and it was the last time I took life seriously, with no love lost and no respect lost. lol
People like to talk about “the matrix” as if they ESCAPED from it. Kudos to them. Keep the stories going.
I just walked away as she held the door open for me to peacefully leave, and I thanked her. Maybe I’m favored… fortunate… etc….
It was after a conversation about money, and how she doesn’t want to "need" money from someone else, especially a “nigga”. lol
(She’s said enough… don’t overthink it.)
Of course she’d projected those sentiments on to her children, while simultaneously asking me for money from time to time.
So I asked her about where the money’s going, and she got offended. She didn’t know I was asking so I could type in the correct amount to send, but I let her believe whatever she believed… (isn’t that what you do when you see someone as their own individual self and don’t want to impose your assumptions on to them? Lol). Apparently that’s a sin or something… lol
She interpreted that as an audit on her lifestyle and priorities. It was lost in translation after that, I guess.
She took that and tried to make it seem like I’d just hold it over her head and treat her like she owed me or something… ignorant to the fact that I was more focused on writing or making a song than “keeping score” on someone else’s woes in a system built off of a fraudulent caste system. Social stratification is a thing.
That didn’t matter though, she had already spoken judgment over me, saying that I’d use money as a means to “control” something that only she should have autonomy over, which is her lifestyle and her household.
So I asked her, “you can’t ask a man for money directly without feeling uncomfortable, but you’d freely ask the government to take it away from him by force?”
And all I heard was silence. 🤣
Like…. SILENCE silence.
I heard glass shatter, but nowhere in the house was there broken glass… lol I thought I was having an auditory hallucination… lol
It was that exact moment… I realized I was “providing” and “protecting” for a group of entities that saw me as nothing more than a working-class slave that’s the loser of every war whenever there’s a war. A false reality built on false pretenses, all because they wanted someone else’s “ice” to be colder.
It’s a reason why some people call law enforcement or involve the courts not out of genuine fear or immediate danger, but as a form of control, retaliation, or discipline.
That time is over.
Nothing more was said, she got up, went to the door, opened the door, and I quietly exited that reality, and while they all looked down to avoid eye-contact, I said, “thank you”. And that was it. No “you’re welcome” or the follow-up “thank YOU, too”… Just broken masks and eyes to the ground in silence, anywhere other than towards me. As soon as I left the vicinity, it destroyed itself. Proof that it was my presence that was holding it together.
It wasn’t an action-packed escape from a collapsing cave like you’d see in a movie.
It was a real-life, quiet implosion of a distorted ego holding the door open for me to leave a place before it self-destructed. Not for the sake of love, but for the sake of their loyalty to the master they now realize they serve.
